5 stages every Dubai-return Pakistani goes through

A snapshot of how 'Dubai-walas' figure out life in the homeland.

UAE-born expats usually find it hard to adjust to life back home, especially after having spent over a decade here, and if you happen to belong to a - what is popularly called - "developing country".
A move from Dubai or Abu Dhabi to a developing country is not just a major culture shock for many young expats but basic amenities turn to luxuries.
The writer was one such expat - after having spent nearly 15 years of his life here, his family wrapped up their lives and moved to Pakistan, and just like any other expat - the writer was a 'Fresh Off the Boat Dubai-wala' who was not prepared for the move.

Here are the five stages of emotions I went through as I figured my way through life in Pakistan:

Culture shock

Often teased as a 'Dubai-wala' (a colloquial term for Dubai-return residents), UAE-return desis were considered as pampered soft kids, who are out of touch with the realities of life - especially life in Pakistan. They mostly speak in English and are clueless about everyday life in the homeland.
Mind you, it's one thing vacationing in Pakistan but a totally different ball-game when it comes to living there for months and years on!
Mostly everyone wears a shalwar kameez (a popular national dress) while most expats raised in UAE are most comfortable in bermuda shorts as we need to stay cool all year round!
Even though you may have not lived in Dubai, all UAE-return Pakistanis are referred to as the 'Dubai-wala' because - given Dubai's aggressive branding all over the world - Dubai represents UAE for most back home.
Hey or Hi turn to Asalam Alaikum, followed by a hug and handshake. Your language becomes more 'flowery', going from cursing in English to Urdu or a regional language (if you speak one).

Adjustment

One of the first things that hits you as you land back home is that you have a new found respect for basic facilities such as 24x7 running water and electricity - something every expat takes for granted in the UAE. But back home, constant power and water outages takes a lot of adjusting as one needs to plan out their lives accordingly.
You can't just step into the bathroom for a shower. First, you check the taps for water, light up the geyser (if you happen to use a manual one which needs to be lit up like a stove) and wait, while hoping, that there is no water-shedding. Clearly, going to the toilet is no less than a mission - if the water happens to stop while you are in.
Back in 1999 and early noughties (2000s), home delivery wasn't the norm at corner stores and if you happen to the be the 'man of the house', it is your duty to make frequent visits a day, from getting yoghurt or curd to the month's grocery.

Insecurity

Anybody who has had to move back to Pakistan will agree that this merits as a separate stage of emotion that all of us go through.
Personally, 9/11 happened shortly after the writer moved, and the world, including Pakistan, was never the same again.
Growing up in UAE, we take security for granted as residents here feel safe taking a midnight leisurely stroll or drive around town.
Street crimes are nearly a daily occurrence back home, including the metropolis - Karachi (where the writer lived) so one is always on guard. Anxiety becomes your normal state of mind, always being wary of your expensive belongings when you are out and being suspicious of anyone on a bike - because they very well could be 'biker boys' on their mugging spree.

Making peace

Gradually, you adapt - one has to. Personally, it took the writer nearly six years - as he made his way through university after having done O'Levels and A'Levels.
Life in Pakistan, inadvertently, turns you into an eco-warrior, learning effective and efficient use of power and water. You master your way around using a generator and UPS (uninterruptible power supply devices) - something which UAE-born Pakistani expats never have to deal with.
English slowly becomes your second or third language as Urdu becomes your language of choice, because some things are best said in your language, especially those 'inside dirty jokes'.

Assimilating

The final stage - becoming a true blue 'desi' (a colloquial term for people of the subcontinent). You are no more the outsider, the pampered soft kid - the 'Dubai-walah'. Although you may miss the 'easy going' comfortable 'first world' UAE life, even a week long vacation away from Pakistan makes you miss home, the various outages, the food and the people.
You begin to own the  adage - 'you can take a Pakistani out of Pakistan, but not the Pakistan in him'.
yousufk@khaleejtimes.com

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