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'He's gone?' Heartbroken UAE fans grieve pop star Liam Payne's untimely death

The 31-year-old star had reportedly suffered a fatal fall from his third-floor hotel balcony on Wednesday evening

Shocked fans in the UAE are recalling how they woke up on Thursday to the tragic news of former One Direction band member Liam Payne's untimely death in Buenos Aires, Argentina. The 31-year-old star had reportedly suffered a fatal fall from his third-floor hotel balcony on Wednesday evening, with speculations rife that he was under the influence of substances during the incident.

'Directioners' (as fans of the former pop group are called) found themselves heartbroken for the third time since the boy band was formed in 2010 — the first due to singer Zayn Malik's exit from the group, followed by the boy band announcing its split, and now, the shocking passing of its member, who was known for his song writing skills and jolly personality.

"This is devastating. I am so shocked. You really don't know what happens behind closed doors. Everything may seem okay on the outside but we never know what's happening inside," said Yara Lahoud, a 28-year-old Lebanese expat based in Dubai, referencing the star's possible relapse into addiction issues. Liam had previously spoken out about 'hitting rock bottom' and struggling with both alcoholism and substance abuse.

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Suchitra Appiah, a 22-year-old expat residing in Dubai, woke up to a text from her best friend asking her if she had checked Instagram, followed simply by the pop star's name. "I thought she meant he’d done something wild (in the good way), maybe even big news like the band reuniting. But then I opened Instagram, and the first post I saw was 'RIP Liam Payne'."

"It didn’t make sense, and I couldn’t process it. As much as I adored him in the past, I hadn’t followed their solo careers closely over the last few years, so I had no idea he was going through so much. And now, he’s just... gone?" said the fan in disbelief, while speaking to Khaleej Times.

Sudanese expat Waad El Magboul found herself listening to One Direction songs on repeat as she made her way to work during the morning hours. "It’s surreal to think he’s gone," said the 26-year-old.

Huge part of childhood

For several fans in the country, the band played a huge role during their adolescent years, with some even crediting it for helping them build friendships. "Liam played such a huge role in my teenage years. One Direction wasn’t just a band — it became a part of my identity. Being a 'Directioner' brought me so much joy and helped me build one of my closest friendships. My friend and I would sit in our parents' cars, screaming their lyrics at the top of our lungs. Listening to their music now instantly pulls us into an ocean of nostalgia. It’s like the songs are the only connection we have to our inner child, and I’ll forever be grateful to them for that," added Suchitra.

For Dubai-based audio engineer, producer and vocalist, Aarti Venkat, the news was difficult to stomach. "It’s super bizarre to know that he’s passed; it’s uncomfortable in a way because One Direction has been such a big part of my life since I was barely a teenager. You don’t ever expect one of your childhood icons to pass away so early."

For Ananya Murali, a 22-year-old musician and audio engineer based in Dubai, it was One Direction's music that inspired her to professionally chase her dreams of a career in music. She says their albums had a huge influence on her, something she started appreciating even more once she started her career.

Sharjah-based web developer Maheen was listening to their songs on the radio while on her way to work. "After hearing the news, all the memories of 'fangirling' over One Direction came rushing back in. Their songs will feel so different now."

Aaliyah Munshi, a 22-year-old Dubai resident, remembered her visit to UK's Madame Tussauds in 2013, when she took a picture next to wax statues of the members as an excited teenager. "I’m absolutely heartbroken by this news. My deepest thoughts are with his family and friends. Rest in peace. Thank you, Liam, for being such a big part of my childhood memories."

'Was hoping for a reunion'

Although it has been nearly 10 years since the band announced an indefinite hiatus in 2016, fans still held out hope for a reunion. For many, Liam's passing is forcing them to accept a different, more bitter reality.

“I can’t believe the first (possible) One Direction reunion may be a funeral. The 13-year-old in me can’t take this,” said Aariz Faridi, a 21-year-old university student residing in Sharjah.

Another devoted fan, Meher D., who fought with her parents as a teen for not allowing her to attend their 2015 concert at the Sevens Stadium, is another one who hoped for a reunion. "I’m heartbroken, gutted, shattered. I would've been happy to see them reunite once more — even if it was for just one song."

2015 live performance

One Direction's iconic performance in 2015 is still a treasured memory for the fan base. The singer also performed at Global Village in 2018 and again in 2019 at the Dubai Media City Amphitheatre.

"When the concert was announced in 2015, it was groundbreaking [for me]. I was set on attending it, even though it was on a Saturday night, and I had school early next morning," said Ananya, reminiscing. "The concert itself was larger than life. I had bronze tickets so I sat all the way at the back, but even from there, the screams and cheers were deafening. I was a little sad that Zayn wasn’t present [the singer had left the group just before the concert], the rest of the guys did an amazing job. It was a memorable night," added the vocalist.

Dubai resident Amrithashree Kumrouth attended the performance — which was her first concert — and described it as 'one of the best concerts she's been to'.

"I remember crying the day I bought the tickets because I couldn’t believe I was finally going to see them live — it was a dream come true. Their music made me feel happy and alive. To this day, that is one of the best concerts I’ve been to. I sang my heart out and felt like I was so close to them."

Twenty-three-year-old student Aliya Modak remembers standing in line for the concert with her best friend Kashish. "I was hysterical when I found out they were coming down for a concert in Dubai. Liam’s death is going to leave a big hole in the fandom’s heart and it’s going to take some time for all of us to recover from this."

Her friend Kashish was also stunned after hearing the news. "I can’t imagine how 13-year-old me, who went to their concert, would have reacted to this news. Even after the band’s breakup, I always held onto the hope of a reunion. This news has truly devastated the teen Directioner in me."

Suchitra was unable to attend the band's concert in 2015. Nine years on, she says she found herself in the same position she was in on the evening of the missed event: listening to their hit song 'Story of My Life' on YouTube while scrolling through the comments. "In 2015, I missed their Dubai concert right after Zayn quit, and I spent that night sobbing, glued to my iPad, reading YouTube comments from other fans who were grieving with me," she added. "I felt like that same helpless 14-year-old girl today."

'Dad' of the group

It was Liam's personality that struck a chord with many fans, as he was often goofing around in front of the camera, yet also looking out for the other boys.

"Out of all of the guys, Liam was my favourite because of his beautiful vocals and awkward charm. He was the 'dad' of the group in a way — he made stupid jokes but he had the kindest heart," said Ananya.

In October 2016, Liam released his first solo Strip That Down after the band's hiatus announcement, while trying to break away from the group's 'good boy' image. After the song, he collaborated with other top artists and released his own singles.

Last year, he published a video to fans on his YouTube channel in which he spoke about his family, making new art, and performing again after having given up alcohol. He thanked supporters for sticking with him through difficult times.

"In the years post One Direction, he didn't make the best decisions, so he was subject to a lot of online trolling and criticism. What makes me sad is that this is what he witnessed before he passed — that people didn’t like him anymore. The internet is horrible in that way. He really was beloved; he just had a rough few years... It feels like I lost a friend," added the heartbroken expat.

Suchitra summed up what most fans are grappling with today. "It feels like I’ve lost more than just a person I once loved and idolised — I'm grieving the loss of a part of my own past."

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