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Addressing unspoken resistance to ideas

Friend: Ajay, I’ve been facing a situation at work where I share ideas.It feels like there’s resistance, but no one tells me why. It’s frustrating because I’m trying to contribute, but I’m not sure how to break through.

Ajay: That’s a tough spot to be in. It’s not uncommon to encounter resistance that isn’t openly discussed. People might not want to confront you directly or they could be unsure themselves. Have you tried asking them how they truly feel about your ideas?

Friend: I haven’t directly asked for their reactions, but I’ve tried explaining my ideas with more details. Still, the response is lukewarm.

Ajay: Pushing harder might make them retreat more. Instead, try to invite their honest feedback. You could ask, "How is this idea landing with you, truly?" or "What are your thoughts on the potential downsides?" This shows you value their perspective, which might encourage them to open up.

Friend: That makes sense. I think the problem is with them, not the idea. Like, why wouldn’t they see the value in what I’m suggesting?

Ajay: It’s easy to fall into that mindset, but it’s important to understand their concerns. Ask questions that dig deeper, like "Can you share a time when something similar didn’t work?" or "What risks are you worried about?" This approach might reveal underlying experiences that influence their resistance.

Friend: I can see how that could change the conversation. But what if the discussion gets too tense?

Ajay: In those moments, it helps to pause and ensure you’re both on the same page. Summarise what you’ve heard and check if you’re understanding them correctly. For example, "It sounds like your biggest concern is X, is that right?" This can calm the situation and prevent misunderstandings. Sometimes, you need to ask for their help in finding a solution. Share your dilemma and ask for their input. It’s a way to involve them in the problem-solving process, which can lead to new ideas.

Friend: That’s a good idea. I hadn’t thought about it that way. It’s about making them feel included, not just convincing them.

Ajay: Exactly. When you tap into others’ insights, you not only uncover potential blind spots but also build a more collaborative environment.

— Dr Ajayya Kumar is a management thinker, art enthusiast, mentor, business advisor, author, and strategist. Views expressed are his own and do not reflect the newspaper’s policy.