For Yasser, jewellery is an art form and a powerful expression of identity
lifestyle4 days ago
There is a girl that resides within the woman that is Noor Naem. And that girl keeps making a special appearance every now and then when we chat — about her life as a refugee from Iraq, about the childhood she spent in Turkey, about the dreams she nurtured while growing up in the United States, one that finally led Noor Naem to become Noor Stars, whose musings on everyday life have made her one of the Arab world’s biggest social media icons.
That she was shaped by her circumstances is evident from the journey Noor has had through life. “I did not have a normal childhood,” she says. “What people often do not realise is that whatever you go through in your childhood stays with you.” One of those things, in Noor’s case, has been this ability to feel, and hence be unafraid of being vulnerable on social media, a quality that makes her relatable to the 60 million followers she has on it.
When Noor says life has not been easy, she is probably understating her experiences. Born in Iraq, she lived in Syria and Turkey before finally moving to the United States. “From childhood to now, I don’t feel I have settled. And it’s not a nice feeling. Any change scares you because you are reminded of all the traumas. It’s something you have to deal with for the rest of your life. You just learn to deal with it better.”
Noor says what hardships do, in fact, lead you to is purpose. As a social media star, she says her purpose is not merely to entertain, but empathise with those that are hurting. She has often been taunted by friends and family for such idealism and being “too emotional”, but she fully owns these traits.
Ownership of emotions at an early age also meant that a new medium had to be found to speak to the world. And that’s when YouTube came in handy. “I discovered YouTube when I was just a student in Michigan,” she recalls. “I had discovered some English YouTubers and was very inspired by them. But at that time, I could not speak in English. So, I started doing videos in Arabic. At that time, I did not even know there would be an audience for it. But as I began to upload videos, it turned out that people were watching.”
One of these early videos, posted about 10 years ago and viewed more than two million times, shows Noor talking about what is in her iPhone. Another video sees her talking about the perils of shifting houses. Snippets from everyday life that resonate among the masses. “When I started YouTube, I was very young. My audience became my second parent, I grew up in front of them.”
As is customary on social media, with a lot of love comes a lot of hate. Looking back, Noor says it is her emotional side that people have typically tried to shame her for and then it became about something else. “At the beginning of my career, when I started getting numbers as a content creator, the conversation was — ‘She is able to do that because she is a girl and a pretty one at that’. It affected me and I wanted to prove them wrong. Then there was a phase when I stopped taking care of myself and gained weight. I was still getting numbers. The conversation then turned towards — ‘Why is she even successful? She is overweight.’ After that point, I realised they hate you because they want to break you. That’s why I don’t want to focus on haters.”
As for the followers, she says the reason she resonated en masse is because “when you share your feelings, you actually connect with other people”. “People who are emotional make it big on social media because you need to be vulnerable for people to be able to connect with you. I did not know that when I started, I was simply sharing my stories authentically. That made me resonate with people. Also, I was never ashamed of my past. I was honest from the first day,” she says. “Being vulnerable and sharing your emotions and being authentic is key to being on social media. Don’t overshare but share something. It enables people to trust you. They can’t trust someone who is mysterious or is sitting on a high horse. But if someone is being themselves, people will trust them. Once you have the audience’s trust, you’ve won. Not just on social media, but in life.”
What Noor did not know was that would pave the way for a kind of success that would catapult her into the top league. “I wanted to be successful. I did not have another choice. I was to be either successful or be hungry. And I did not want to be hungry,” she laughs. “My mother played an important role in building my confidence. I would walk up to her with the craziest ideas and she’d say, ‘Of course, you can do it.’ Now, I know my imagination is the reason I achieved what I did,” she says, adding that there are moments now when she asks her mother how she believed her daughter could achieve anything she wanted. “All she says is, ‘I did not know, but who was I to break your heart.’”
Growing up with a single mother had been anything but easy. “But it made me stronger. I did not have any other choice,” says Noor. “I have a feminine side to me that I don’t show too easily because I always felt the need to possess masculine energy. Growing up without a male figure is tough because you have to learn to do a lot of things for your family. Thankfully, my mother was always by my side.”
The absence of a male figure in one’s formative years also impacts one’s relationship with men in personal as well as professional spaces. “You become more naïve,” says Noor. “You believe everything. And then you realise, no, it’s all business. You tell yourself, ‘This person cannot do this because he is just like a father figure to me.’ The fact is: nobody is your father. It’s business. It’s all about numbers. The male figure in your life teaches you how to deal with other men. You start experiencing things that break your heart and then you become cautious. You realise not all people are bad, neither are all people good.”
The result of evolving in a fiercely competitive space like social media is that you never pause to examine your relationship with success. Noor says it is difficult to pause because maintaining that level of success requires greater hard work (“I have witnessed the rise and fall of many content creators within a year or two of starting out. A lot of people work very hard but they also give up,” she says). “I never stopped to look at my success until recently. I was always focused on the next steps. People do not realise that success is a byproduct of years of taking small steps. There is a saying, ‘Success is rented and every day, the rent is due.’ I truly believe that.”
And while that may be true, she admits to feeling lonelier every year. “And it’s not because there are no people around me. Something changes every year; it’s not a bad thing. You learn how to deal with it. You are forced to sit with yourself and learn how to be comfortable with yourself,” says Noor, adding that she has admired Indian actress Priyanka Chopra Jonas because growing up, she saw her break stereotypes. “You tell her she cannot and she shows you she can. Such women inspire me.”
Today, Noor’s footprint on social media has also expanded to a podcast she hosts and one of the key themes she is keen to dissect is mental health. “We all have traumas. It’s still hard to talk about it because it is a taboo subject. I have many guests who come on the podcast and talk about therapy and their experience with it behind the scenes. But when I ask them to talk about it on camera, they refuse because it’s still a big deal in this part of the world. While I have never been to a therapist, I am doing the work with myself — journaling, for instance. My past as a refugee, for instance, is something I am very comfortable with. I went through a phase where I was mad and angry, but now I realise everything happens for a reason. I don’t feel any shame because I did not play any role in it. In fact, I survived it. So, if anything, I should be proud of that.”
Having lived in the United States for a considerable time, Noor moved to the UAE three years ago. “In America, I was quite far from my audience. I would post during the daylight but it would be night-time here. And now I feel I am closer to them,” she says. “And that is important because I truly cherish the moments with my followers. Even if I happen to meet them for the first time, they feel they have already known me. People’s love is a gift from God and I don’t take it for granted.”
The pressing question in the mind of every young achiever is — what’s next? Noor admits that she has stopped having very specific goals because once you’ve achieved them, you hit a wall. For now, she just wants to maintain the robust following she already commands on social media and keep growing further. “Another goal is to have a family. I have to put it as a goal because we are a part of a very fast-paced industry. If you don’t know what you want, you will just forget about it and then wake up many years later regretting not making that choice. I want to have a family I always dreamed of. Family is where you go when you are broken, lonely and unhappy. And the bigger the family, the better it is.”
anamika@khaleejtimes.com
Photos: Shihab; Shoot Direction: Somya Mehta: Location Courtesy: Shangri La Dubai
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