The key to a happy marriage

Last week, the government announced it awarded almost Dh200 million in marriage grants to Emiratis in 2022. The unique and generous programme supports eligible citizens by covering wedding costs, sparing them one of the biggest financial expenses that couples face, and setting them off on the right foot for a promising family future.

According to Hessa Bint Essa Buhumaid, Minister of Community Development, “Marriage grants help our younger generations build a stable life and enhance material stability.”

The grants are just one example of how the UAE government supports and encourages Emiratis take that next step into family life. Mass weddings, where hundreds of couples wed, are also regularly organised by the ministry and free marriage counselling and guidance services are also available to help couples learn more about their marital roles, the various dynamics and managing expectations as part of efforts to help them create and maintain long and happy unions.

These are significant and admirable steps taken by the government, but the success and longevity of a marriage remains the couple’s responsibility. A happy and long union is usually the goal, but that is often much easier said than done, and requires plenty of work to nurture. A successful marriage relies on consistent effort on both sides, and significant factors such as love, compromise, compatibility, trust, and respect.

According to Harvard Health, those who are married tend to live longer, have fewer strokes and heart attacks, have a lower chance of becoming depressed and be less likely to have advanced cancer at the time of diagnosis and more likely to survive cancer for a longer period of time. Yet, this doesn’t mean that just being married automatically provides these health benefits. The benefits of marriage only apply if you are in a healthy and happy relationship.

People who are in stressful or unhappy marriages could in fact be worse off than unmarried people who are surrounded by caring friends and a supporting family. Interestingly, however, many of the aforementioned health benefits are more pronounced for married men than they are for married women.

I know this too well, as I was once in an unhappy marriage – the most stressful time of my life. So much so they manifested in physical ailments. It turned out that the man I married was an imposter who fooled many others just like he did me. I was able to get out without too many complications as at the time I did not have any children, and I feel very lucky for that.

Coming to a decision to end a marriage is an incredibly difficult one, and due to societal and sometimes family pressures, it’s no surprise that some people choose to stay in a marriage in which they are not happy. It is complex and there are many reasons why people choose to stay, especially when children are involved, with guilt playing a major role.

— rasha@khaleejtimes.com