Husbands gone, these UAE-based women took life head on

It is not possible to fly on one wing. But many gutsy women in the UAE do just that.

As widows and single mothers, they fight all odds to soar high. On International Women's Day, Anjana Shankar and Ashwani Kumar bring you the extraordinary fights of four ordinary women facing life's adversities.

'Don't take your regular support system for granted'

P.V., Bank employee from Chennai

The loss of a partner can topple your life. For P.V., the untimely death of her husband Vasanthan in 2013 left her as the sole caregiver of their then five-year-old twin daughters. "It was just two days of illness and then he was gone, at just 37," said P.V., now 38. "We never planned for anything like this. We took our regular support system for granted. I have tried my best to fill the void for my children. We continue to live in the same house and neighbourhood, so they could go to the same school and see their friends," the widow said.

P.V. found emotional healing in friends and supportive colleagues. When your partner is gone, there is no time to grieve, as the task of putting your life in order rests entirely on your shoulders. Having a job and her own visa was a huge saving grace, she points out. "Luckily, I was working. Financial support is a top priority during such crises. Your husband's bank accounts - even if they are a joint accounts - will be frozen. Going forward was not easy, as all assets in the name of the deceased are released only on the advice of the local courts. You also need no objection certificates from male relatives," she said. She also struggled with sponsorship issues of her children. "It's not easy for a woman to sponsor kids. Only women with certain jobs can get it," said P.V., who works at a public sector bank.

Through it all, P.V. says she has drawn her strength from life's challenges. "I came here in 2001. This is the only home my kids have known. So I have to fight it out for my kids," she said.

Annamma Varghese's son Arun says she is the family's biggest source of strength

'My husband had planned our future before his death'

Annamma Varghese, businesswoman from Kerala

In the long verdant stretch of what is called the Mina Flower and Plant Market in Abu Dhabi, Annamma is the lone female face. The Umm Al Salsal Trading Flowers and Indoor Plants run by the 60-something widow has blossomed into a success story, even after her husband V.A. Varghese's death in 2013.

"When his health worsened, he told me never to shut the shop even if it runs into losses. It's the fruit of his blood and sweat. I would have closed it and returned to India otherwise," said Annamma.

"He was diabetic and had kidney stones, but would never take medicines." But Annamma credits all her success to Varghese's visionary planning and foresight helped her tide over the crisis when he was gone. "In 2004, he transferred the licence of the flower shop to my name. The fact that the shop licence and bank accounts were in my name helped. The family did not even know about the seriousness of his illness till late.

"After the funeral, I returned to Abu Dhabi with many questions and to an uncertain future but he had already arranged everything for me," she said.

After her husband passed away, her son Arun who was in the US, joined her in running the shop. He lives in Abu Dhabi with his wife and two children.

Arun says his mother is the family's source of strength. "Over the years, my mother has grown into a businesswoman. She remains brutally honest - a trait my father instilled in all of us. We may incur losses but have made long-term gains too," said Arun.

After her divorce, Diana brought up son Ronnie, who has special needs, as a single mom

'I tell women to turn weaknesses into strength'

Diana Lama businesswoman from Mumbai

ashwani@khaleejtimes.com