Sometimes, a vacation just isn't enough and you need to call a major timeout instead. But taking off for a year is a scary leap to make. Hear it from those who've done it - and discovered the unpredictable in the process
Consider a recent survey from the US-based Society for Human Resource Management: the study found that the percentage of companies offering sabbaticals - both paid and unpaid - had risen to nearly 17 per cent in 2017. In terms of numbers, that's barely a fifth of the pie. Employers are still learning to put in place a viable structure that would allow them to offer sabbaticals as a perk to valuable members of staff. But that's just corporate talk. Even on a personal level, no matter how much you grit your teeth and yearn (or threaten) to just 'up and leave', reality and responsibilities remain the puppeteers of the game. And so, most resign themselves to dancing as they dictate, the sabbatical nothing more than a pipe dream.
But are timeouts and extended breaks the sole privilege of the moneyed 1 per cent? Not really, say those who've been there and done that. With solid planning, the sabbatical diaries could be yours to write too.
Natalia Wiechowski was at the "peak of her young career" in 2014, winning excellence awards across the Middle East and South Africa for her work with a material handling company. She recalls having wonderful friends, living in a lovely flat, being the proud owner of a sports car - yet feeling neither happy nor successful, despite ticking off all the boxes she was told to tick off by her society, family and peers. In fact, she says, she felt like a "wasted resource. like her work - and life - were meaningless".
The self-trial - where she was constantly asking herself difficult questions and grappling to find answers - began in 2009, she notes, but really peaked by the end of 2013. "They were questions I never had the courage or 'the time' to reflect on, as I was 'too busy' being busy," says the German-born Dubai expat. The identity crisis, meanwhile, was taking a simultaneously disastrous toll on her health and would often see Natalia in a hospital once every month, with doctors unable to find the root problem for her pain and illness. "I also developed a lot of bad habits like comfort eating, staying up late, spending way too much money on things I did not really need."
By March 2014, Natalia decided she had to figure out a "less shallow, less negative way" of living. And thus began her nine-month journey of self-discovery.
During this time, she read up to five books a week, worked on finalising her PhD thesis in philosophy, started meditating, changed her diet, spent more time in nature, and engaged in more sports, among other pursuits.
The result? "I realised a few interesting things after about 7-8 months," says Natalia. "The good news was: I was not crazy. I had 'woken up', decided to take ownership of my life, and found my own unique way of living life and contributing to society." The bad news, however, was that she had to unlearn or relearn almost everything - from the way she thought and spoke to her outlook on various subjects - and would need much more time off than the 12 months she'd initially planned to focus on self-development.
In order to finance this 'mission', she had to be smart with her money. "That meant no brunches, shopping, travelling, fancy dinners, parties, malls, cinema visits, weekends on yachts. I got rid of my credit card and started to cook every other day. I learnt how to entertain myself without spending money, and lived primarily on the savings I'd earned a few years ago."
Today, Natalia is a personal branding strategist and keynote speaker, working to help others find the best version of themselves. To those considering a break, she says, "Prepare yourself - strategically, financially and emotionally. Ask yourself serious questions: what is the purpose of your sabbatical? How much money will you need (not want!) to live a minimalistic life during that time? What can you do when you go through massive doubts? Whom can you ask for help if you run out of money? A sabbatical can change your life, but I would definitely not advise anyone to go on one for the sake of it."
For the vast majority of those who embark on sabbaticals, the decision usually comes on the heels of total burnout. Many slog through, pushing mind and body, and ignoring all indicators that a 'reset' is long overdue. Former Dubai expat Nigel Hayward has just begun a six-month hiatus and does not hesitate to admit that he'd reached a point where he was struggling to stay on top of things at work - or distinguish between 'urgent' tasks and 'important' tasks. It all started two years ago, but the 59-year-old, who works for the UK office of the same engineering consultancy he was with in Dubai, didn't think the time was right for a break back then - even though it was his boss's idea for him to take one. However, when everything started "coming at [him] with no respite" - work stress coupled with his mother's passing a few months ago - Nigel finally decided to call timeout. It helped that he'd had a similar experience of burnout in the mid-90s, and could therefore recognise the symptoms. And while he's still attached to his email ("a bad sign!"), he's slowly working towards winding down.
What does he plan to do with a schedule that's suddenly opened up? For someone who'd spent more than three decades abroad, the idea of travelling the world - aka "spending my time at airports and in planes" - was highly unappealing to Nigel, who plans instead to spend a couple of weeks walking around where he grew up in the UK and reconnecting with the area. "I've got my bucket list of things to do," he says. "Spending some time out in the wild on my own is a key part... I also enjoy DIY projects... But otherwise, I'm going to take it as it comes."
Sabbaticals are easy decisions to make if you've got a safety net in place - like the promise of your job when you return. "I got a letter that says they don't guarantee me a job," jokes Nigel, self-deprecatingly. "But that doesn't worry me. I'm still arrogant enough to think I'm saleable on the market. You've got to be optimistic!"
He argues that sabbaticals weren't completely unheard of 'back in the day' - but attributed their current popularity to the high-pressure nature of the daily grind today. As for why the demographics point to more women taking sabbaticals than men, Nigel ripostes, "It's still a man's world, isn't it? You need more footballers crying on TV for something like this to challenge those perceptions, and not have it impact one's career progression negatively." Most of his own friends seem to think he's only on holiday, not realising there is an underlying reason behind the break. But Nigel, who has no plans to retire yet, is taking it one day at a time for now. "At the end of these six months, I'd just like to see myself a lot happier, a lot less stressed and able to focus again. That's the goal."
British expat Helen McGuire has been on not one, but two sabbaticals to date. The first was almost a year long, at the age of 21 when she was fresh out of university and eager to explore the world. The second was after she'd worked for six years at "the job of her dreams" - as a producer for BBC Radio 1 in London. It had taken her a long time to get to that post but, compelled by a desperate need to get away from her "frenetic lifestyle", she booked a trip to South America, where she spent three months travelling the country. Both trips changed her life, yielding "unpredictable results": the first opened her up to new schools of thought, exposed her to various cultures and ways of living, and set her on a path completely different from her original plan; the second helped her realise how much she enjoyed her work and routine, allowing her to refocus on her career with "a real fire" upon her return.
The family was not exactly crazy about the idea of her disappearing for a few months the second time around - because she was well-established in London by then. But while being so "completely out of your comfort zone was petrifying" for Helen, she also notes it was a journey, not a holiday. "When you don't have that mirror of self-reflection around you constantly - the people who give you your identity - and you're on your own, you quickly learn where you should and shouldn't be, who to trust... It strengthens your personality, and you're much surer of yourself and the decisions you make when you return."
Now the co-founder of Hopscotch.ae, a platform that empowers women in the region through career opportunities, events and initiatives, she believes employers should be more open to offering sabbaticals as a perk. "After all, flexibility is one of the most important things millennials look for in jobs these days."
Understanding that sabbaticals are not feasible for everyone, however, she too offers a word of caution. "When you're younger without responsibilities, it's easier. But if that's not your situation, know that sabbaticals are just one way to help you gain clarity on life. But there are other resources too."
karen@khaleejtimes.com
Natalia Wiechowski
Nigel Hayward
Helen McGuire
Karen Ann Monsy is Associate Editor, overseeing digital operations in the newsroom. She sees the world through headlines and SEO keywords - and loves building people and teams.