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Family is incomplete sans son, mother of 15 daughters tells KT

Hyderabad - "We managed to get three of my daughters married with help from the community, but I don't know what fate has in store for my other five daughters who are with me."

At a time when the fight against gender discrimination and encouragement of the girl child are major focus points in debates and government awareness programs in India, a woman in nearby Bidar district of Karnataka, in her quest (and undoubtedly her husband's too) for a male child, gave birth to 15 daughters, the last as recent as June 11.
The tragic twist to the couples' continued attempts at getting a male child is that six of the 15 daughters are dead, and they are poverty-stricken barely in a position to manage two square meals a day.
A resident of Sindhol Tanda, a tribal hamlet about 15km from Bidar town, Seetambai, who doesn't know her age, told Khaleej Times that she has been married for about 25 years, and during this period, she delivered 15 daughters since she and her husband, who works as a daily wage laborer in Mumbai, were keen on having a son.
"In our community (Lambadas, a wandering tribal community), it is very essential to have a son to gain respect. Without a son, the family is incomplete," she said. "Besides, we believe that only a son can do something worthwhile, and provide something for his parents, even if it's half a roti (bread) when he grows up," the brightly-clad woman argued when asked how a son was better than a daughter. While 14 of her daughters were born at home, the 15th child was born at a nearby Primary Health Care Centre, where she abandoned the baby.
The child has since been handed over to an adoption centre, and Seetambai, seemingly relieved, doesn't have any remorse for her act of abandoning the child. "What can I do? I already have five daughters at home to feed. Even they get their day time meals from the anganwadi (a government-run institution for children) in our village," she says in a matter-of-fact tone.
Has she finally realised that it is futile to go on trying for a male child? "Yes. I have agreed to undergo vasectomy on the advice of a government official who counseled me. I don't have a choice," the tribal woman said with more than a hint of reluctance in her voice.
"We managed to get three of my daughters married with help from the community, but I don't know what fate has in store for my other five daughters who are with me," she said, pointing out that her job as an agriculture labour, which lasts only a few months in a year, is hardly enough to make both ends meet.
Her husband, an alcoholic, comes home every six months and stays for about two to three months.
He gives the family Rs4,000 to 5,000 on which they have to manage throughout the year. "We are landless people and the going is really tough for us," says Seethambai without blinking an eyelid over the fate that she and her husband have called upon themselves.
Shockingly, Gopal Rathod, an educated youth from the same community who works as a teacher, argues that the village elders don't have a role to play in such situations.
When asked why they didn't counsel Seetambai all these years, Rathod said: "How can we meddle in their family affair? It is a very personal issue. The issue here is that they are only guilty of giving life and not otherwise. It is for the government to take up such awareness programs which they have failed, at least in the case of our village."
District Child Protection Officer (DCPO) P S Ithkampalli, when contacted by Khaleej Times said the government was making all efforts to help the family. "We are trying to facilitate a bank loan for her under a government scheme to eke out a livelihood. Besides, we have admitted one of her daughters in an orphanage where her education and health needs will be taken care of," he said, even as he admitted that the awareness programmes on girl child were not reaching remote villages.
The official, however, pointed out that at least 50 persons from the hamlet were well educated and were holding responsible positions, both in the government and private sectors. - news@khaleejtimes.com